unmotivated...

i'm feeling so unmotivated today/tonight...so unmotivated that i don't even feel like using capital letters. i'm just not feeling very good...i'm a little sick to my stomach and just feeling a little depressed overall--not for any specific reason and not really anything serious, just a little down tonight. i don't want to do anything but lay on the couch or putz around on the computer. i have a bunch of dishes to wash and it's taken me hours to even get myself to start them (i'm happy to say i have made some progress...very little, but some). i called my mom earlier to cheer myself up and possibly find some motivation, and that helped some (that's what finally got me to work on the dishes and tidy up the house).

the cat has been really needy tonight and has kept crying for me to hold/pet him...i guess he's a little down tonight too. he's my little baby!

ok, let's change topics...no more dwelling on it all. today was the last day of school! YAY!!!!!! stephen and i have been very busy these last few weeks with papers and tests and finishing everything up. actually i was pretty much done with all my stressful stuff last week, but all stephen's stress came this week. it's nice to be done for the summer! no more homework and classes and plays to deal with, just work. i was glad and relieved to find out that my office has some budget money to pay me with this summer. i get paid through work-study during school, and i was afraid they wouldn't have enough money to keep me working during the summer when i don't get work-study. but it turns out they'll just find a way to squeeze enough out of the budget to let me keep working (which means i don't have to worry about finding a different job!). and to add to the good news, they've been scheduling me for more hours than usual, so i'll be making more money than usual. stephen's getting lots more hours at his job too, so we should be able to save up some moolah over summer!

i'm excited to be going down to fallon in a few weeks! stephen and i have two weddings this summer--my brother nathan in july, and stephen's brother matt in august. i can't wait!!!! not much else to say here...i've been working on organizing/filing papers and things, and i have all sorts of little projects/goals waiting for me:

• a box full of important things to scrapbook (including all our wedding memory stuff)
• a box of pictures stephen took years ago to put in a photo album (i LOVE putting together photo albums, but i've been restraining myself until school got out)
• finish reading "macbeth" again (that's the play the college is doing this summer--we can't this time because we'll be gone to matt's wedding during performances--so i wanted to refresh my memory)
• finish crocheting a baby blanket for sarah (my littlest niece)
• start a blanket for the new niece/nephew on the way
• come up with a meal plan
• work on dieting and exercising (i think i've gained another 10 lbs; making susan a total of 20-25 lbs heavier than she was in high school...yuck!! ugh!!)
• and, as always, clean the house

wow...i actually feel a lot better now! i love the healing power of writing!!! i am so excited for summer and the chance to work on all these things i haven't had time for. i just want to improve myself and relax and make my home a nicer place to be.

i now feel so incredibly...motivated!